


Baby Blue Skirt

by trashy_chocolate



Category: Be More Chill - Iconis/Tracz
Genre: (v brief), And smokes some weed, Coming Out, F/F, F/M, Genderfluid Jeremy, Jeremy Is Addicted To Buttons, Let!! Jeremy!! Wear!! Skirts!!, M/M, Other, Referenced Suicide Attempt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-24
Updated: 2017-08-24
Packaged: 2018-12-19 03:33:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,611
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11889072
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/trashy_chocolate/pseuds/trashy_chocolate
Summary: Jeremy is confident in two things, and two things alone. Their sexuality, and how much they love their partners.Jeremy is unconfident in many things, from their appearance to their personality to whether their partners actually love them to their gender.Maybe Jeremy can eventually be confident in one more thing.





	Baby Blue Skirt

**Author's Note:**

> Genderfluid Jeremy?? Yes??? I love my childe

Contrary to what most people seemed to assume, Jeremy was extremely confident in their sexuality. They liked girls and guys and anyone in between, and if someone couldn't accept that, then they were welcome to get the hell out.

Just because they didn't shout it left and right like Rich, or wear a pride flag on their shoulder like Michael, didn't mean that they were insecure about their identity. 

Another thing that they were uncharacteristically confident in was how many people they could be attracted to at once. The concept of polyamory had never struck them as "strange" or "unnatural." As long as everyone in the relationship knew about it and was okay with it, it was a completely normal and healthy aspect of them.

On a similar note, something Jeremy was  _not_ particularly comfortable with was their gender. Some days, constantly being called a guy left their skin crawling, and they found themself wanting to vomit at the thought of wearing anything other than that soft baby blue skirt buried at the back of their closet. Unfortunately, the whole "not confident in their identity" thing also included staying closeted, meaning that they wouldn't dare present they way they wanted to.

After their bi awakening in sixth grade (which was in part thanks to Michael, and the rest due to Brandon Urie), they'd ended up questioning their own identity. Yeah, a boy could like another boy, they never felt bad about that, but were they really a boy?

Long story short, no.

The feelings for Michael were short lived, too, only lasting for most of middle school. When he came out to them as gay in seventh grade, shortly after they'd temporarily chosen the label "agender" for themself, they'd forced themself to get over him. They weren't a boy, and even if he ever did reciprocate, it'd only be because he saw them as a boy.

Bad feelings all around. Cursed. That three year crush was certainly something they'd keep to the grave.

After the whole "squipcident," they'd started going out with Christine, but it still felt off. Surely, she must have liked them as a boy, and as a boy alone, right?

They figured that if she wouldn't like them for their actual identity, it'd be good to know. So, halfway through their junior year, Christine was the first of Jeremy's friends to know that they were genderfluid.

She'd assured them that she was bi, and she'd love them no matter their gender. It was a warm, fuzzy feeling, that level of acceptance. They decided right then and there that it was their favorite feeling.

The second person to know about any of those three things was Rich, their other partner. The two had also grown closer to each other after the whole squip ordeal, because nothing like mutual trauma to draw people together, right?

Jeremy had already had the polyamory discussion with Christine, as she was also dating Brooke. So, as soon as they had the courage to act on their weird new feelings for him, they went for it. 

It took a little bit of reassuring for Rich to be certain that  _"No, I'm not cheating on Christine, we're both polyamorous, why do you think she gives Broke heart eyes at lunch all the time,"_ but it was cleared up and Jeremy suddenly had two incredible loving significant others.

They'd known Rich was bi from the start, after his epiphany in the hospital, so coming out wasn't quite as nerve-wracking this time. He'd just kissed them and assured them that he'd love them no matter what labels made them comfortable. This, too, was a wonderful fuzzy feeling that they wanted to hold onto forever.

A week later, when Rich was staying over that their house, he'd brought up the idea of putting some pride pins on their new "backpack." It was really a messenger bag, one the squip had made them get to replace the "BOYF" bag, which was not conducive to popularity. They ended up actually preferring the less painful aspect of the shoulder strap and kept the bag, and it was the  _perfect_ spot to tack a bunch of dumb buttons onto.

Rich helped them find and order a few pins on Amazon; A bi flag, a polyam flag, a genderfluid flag, and a button with the trans flag and text, saying "Transcend the Binary." He also had a few more...  _obscene_ ideas for what they could buy off the website, which were only met with embarrassment and a playful slap to the arm.

The pins arrived a few days later, and when they showed up at school with the bi and polyam pride buttons, they were met with a wave of hugs and supportive comments from their significant others. When Rich pointed out the lack of the other two pins, they assured him that they had gotten the pins and liked them, but they just weren't ready to be out like that. He gave their arm a gentle, reassuring squeeze, letting them know that he'd be there for them whenever they were ready.

They quietly came out to Michael next, some time in February. The two were getting high in Michael's basement, a habit they'd settled back into starting in late December. Michael knew they always admitted to personal stuff during these sessions, they always had. It was just a trademark of the activity; Michael always ate at least one full bag of chips and Jeremy always blurted out at least one of their secrets.

The last time, they'd admitted that the three weeks they were out of school in sophmore year wasn't because they had pneumonia, but because they had a short stay at a mental hospital after failed suicide attempt number three. The mood had quickly grown somber after that, and they'd laid off the "getting stoned in Michael's basement" sessions for a couple weeks.

This time, however, the secret was a little more light hearted.

"I had a crush on you in middle school," they mumbled, laying sideways on their beanbag. 

"No shit? Me too, dude," Michael responded, shifting in his beanbag to look at them. "Why didn't you tell me, we coulda, like, dated or something. Get the experience, y'know?"

"I have anxiety," they deadpanned, like it was so obviously that they never would've had the guts to confess. "Also, you're gay."

Michael stared at them, confused, as if to say  _"Yeah, I'm gay, that's why I liked you, idiot."_

"I'm not a boy."

"Oh."

Michael looked down at his lap, fiddling with the cord of his headphones.

Jeremy's mind should've been reeling from admitting that, but it wasn't, they weren't freaking out and anticipating horrific rejection, absolutely not, no sir no anxiety here, move along.

"What are you, then?"

That's not rejection, that's not yelling and laughing, good start. Phrasing could use a little work, but good start.

"I'm genderfluid."

Okay, okay, Michael hadn't laugh in their face yet, hope was here. Now just pray that hope stayed.

"What are your pronouns, then?"

Jeremy paused for a moment, thinking. They/them, right? Right. 

"They."

Michael smiled at them, and that warm comfortable feeling was back. They returned the smile, silently berating themself for ever thinking Michael wouldn't accept them. After thirteen years of knowing each other, they ought to know he wasn't the type of person to do that.

"Cool."

The hope stayed.

* * *

 

A couple weeks later, in the middle of March, Jeremy came out to the rest of the group in one fell swoop. They pinned the two remaining buttons to their bag, then went to school in a light grey t-shirt, the typical blue cardigan, and that baby blue skirt that had been lying in wait on the floor of their closet for almost eight months. They also wore a green silicone bracelet with their pronouns written in it that they'd subtly purchased at a Target the year before.

Christine and Rich peppered their face with light kisses, a congratulations and "we're proud of you" for having the courage to come out to their friends. They'd given everyone a quick and easy briefing of their pronouns, and were met with acceptance from everyone. Chloe promised to ruin the social standing of anyone who might dare make fun of them, and Rich and Jake both seemed ready to ruin the _face_ of anyone who did that. 

Aside from one side remark from some old ass teacher about how "skirts are for girls," nothing went terribly wrong that day. They didn't feel particularly dysphoric with the skirt on, which was a welcome feeling. They didn't have to use the bathroom at any point, so no feeling-gross-in-the-boys-bathroom occurred.

They spent the evening over at Christine's house, watching a crappy sitcom and making fun of the bad acting. The two were lying together on Christine's bed, their head resting against her stomach as she absent-mindedly ran her hand through their hair.

"You know, you should wear skirts more often," she remarked. "They show off your legs. I like it."

They felt their face flush, and they threw their arm over their eyes.

"I only have, like, two skirts though," they whined. 

Christine laughed at their blushing demeanor. Not to be mean, but it was funny to see her datefriend so flustered. 

"Wear mine then," she said simply, as if it was just so obvious. 

"Nooooooo, your stuff is way too small for me!"

"Well, at least wear your other skirt tommorow, then. I want to see your legs more," she said, wiggling her eyebrows. "And I'm sure Rich does too," she added with a wink.

"I hate you."

"Love you too, Jer."


End file.
